|Image by me!|
When Hubby drives home from work at night I'm sure he fantasises about the perfect scenario of domestic goddessness that 'could' be waiting for him when he arrives home.
His lovely little wifey waiting for him with baited breath, eagerly anticipating the arrival of her beloved; the king of the castle; the man of the house.
Surfaces gleaming with cleanliness. Delicious dinner lovingly cooked and still piping hot. Cold beer freshly poured. Washing neatly folded and ready to be put away. Children either quietly engaged in a meaningful activity; or better still, in bed asleep.
When he walks through the door he is greeted with adoration and a touch of reverence. His dinner and beer is served up to him and his lovely wifey (me) sits and listens to him reminisce about the hardships of his day, while topping up his beer when it dips dangerously low.
After his meal and when the dishes have been done by his 'perfect wifey', he receives a adoring back rub and then of course his fantasy ends with....well, we all know what it ends with....use your imagination.......or not......if it completely grosses you out.
The reality is much harsher and a lot less 'pretty'.
Wifey is of course eagerly anticipating his arrival...but only because she wants to palm off Miss 2 and her poopy bum as soon as he walks through the door.
Struggling and smelly child is dumped into his arms as soon as he enters the disaster zone. After negotiating the toys littering the floor he is immediately assailed by the older children all demanding his undivided attention. The never ending washing pile is, of course, thrown in a jumbled heap on the couch awaiting the non-existent moment when it may get folded.
Meanwhile, lovely little wifey is bellowing instructions to him from the kitchen while she haphazardly throws together dinner...............
'Miss 2 needs changing....It's Mr 5's turn in the bathtub....Miss 8 has a complex Math problem I don't understand....Mr 11 left his dental plate here again.....Can you set the table?'
After dinner is seen to and the craziness subsides just a little; he may get a cuddle and a kiss and a welcome home from his 'perfect little wifey'. He may get listened to as he helps her do the dishes. He may even score the back rub once the children are in bed....but only if he gives his wifey one too........and the rest? If wifey can keep her eyes open maybe that as well........if he should be so lucky.