Friday, August 7, 2015

When Kids Say Stuff......

Kids say the darndest things. And the cutest. And sometimes the rudest......
Watching them wrap their little mouths around words such as spaghetti and stethoscope usually has highly entertaining results.
       But occasionally they come out with a word that you really wish they could blurt out accurately.
   In my 20 years of working with small people the number 1 word that kids mispronounce guessed it......truck. I swear 9 out 10 kids at some stage of linguistic ability put a big fat "F" in front of it instead of the acceptable "Tr".
   One child of mine was particularly memorable at this stage. He could deadset sense a truck approaching from miles away and the excitement would begin...
  "Here comes a F-uck Mummy! A F-uck!!! Here it comes! It's coming! Will it be a big F-uck? What colour will the F-uck be????' A great, big F-uck!!! Always at the top of his lungs and always repeating the word about 20 times. I swear the neighbours thought we were complete and utter potty mouths. Or he pulled the word out when the MIL was that was always 'interesting'.
    Here are some other shockers that my children have 'announced' at usually inappropriate times......
The time my daughter told me she wanted to grow up and become a 'Fashion Vagina"
When a certain Mr (that of 'truck' fame) referred to the Supermarket as the "Stupid Market" (and I tended to agree.....)
When we took my nephew bushwalking and he was looking everywhere for a big (st)dick.
Or very memorably when my sister (who is in her 30's) referred to an octopuses tentacles as "testicles"
     Along with the downright embarrassing linguistical nightmares comes the downright cute. Some of our cute little family sayings are now woven into the folklore of our family and we pronounce them this way permanently, they still give me a smile whenever I hear them......
   Inside Out is 'Inside Outside'
   Mozzarella is 'Monsterella'
   Kabana and Cheese is "Barnacles and Cheese"
   Coathangers are "Hoatcangers"
   Eleavator is "Alligator"
   Happy Birthday is "Happy Smurfday"
And we all love a trip to "Bunnies" instead of "Bunnings"
My favourite however is a big old fashioned "Huggle" instead of a hug. Infact I still subject my nearly Mr 15 to a huggle whenever I can. Now it's my turn to be the embarrassing one.....
What are some of the cute (and scary!!) things your kids have said over the years??


Thursday, July 23, 2015

Hi There.......

What's that sound?? That strange, creaking tapping sound? Oh yeah, it's my fingers on the keyboard. It's been about a hundred years since I last wrote anything (or more accurately 3 years....but who's counting?)
     I'm suprised that when I pulled the crusty old laptop out of my bag I didn't get attacked by a flock of rabid moths (do moths live in flocks? Or is it a herd of moths? A pack of moths? I'm going with flock......flock sounds good)
  Anyway, off on a tangent already. I feel terribly guilty that I have let my passion for writing diminish. I feel rusty, slow and out of shape, like all of my creativity has dried up or taken off on a very long holiday.
   But a few things have been calling me back to my little corner of cyberspace. I have been writing a little bit in secret. Just a scribble here and there, but when I get a teensy space of time to myself (and I'm not lying, any moment to myself is fleeting) my hands itch for paper and pen. Then a friend told me that they really miss my blog, that I always made her laugh with my descriptions of our crazy life. Hubby then topped it off by telling me I should write again (yup, he's still here, poor bugger)
    Hmmmm, I pondered, is the Universe trying to tell me something? Should I write again? So I popped onto my poor, neglected blog and had a look around.
  And she's exactly the same as she was, my old friend. Sure, she's slightly overgrown with weeds, disheveled and in the need of a good makeover. But a little bit of love an injection of sunshine and I'm sure I can make her glow again. And maybe, just maybe she can inject a bit of joie de vivre into this old writer.
    In my hiatus quite a few things have changed; The children - my terrific, tedious and terrible tribe are essentially the same personality wise. Just bigger.......more stubborn.......and not as cute. Sure, they still light up my life, but each day presents a range of challenges and disasters, just to keep on my toes....and slightly loopy.
   Hubby and I are older, a bit more wrinkled, just a little more worn and happy.....bursting with happiness.....just an exhausted kind of happiness.
   Our house is the same. A mess. Infact if it's humanely possible it's even more of a mess (I'll tell you why in a minute, and no, it's not because I'm lazy, although that is also true)
Toys occupy almost every surface, crumbs litter the floor, sand is embedded in my carpet and Mt Kosciwashko still takes pride of place in my walk in wardrobe.
     The big change is that I went back to work. Yup. You heard it. Work. Me. My life of leisure (Ha!) and luxury (HaHa!) is over and I am officially a WAHM. And guess what? I love it? I opened my heart and my home to a lovely group of little people and set up my own daycare. And it's perfect. It's messy, it's loud, it's funny and I have a life full of unconditional love and just a bit of mayhem. My kids are 'big brothers and sisters' to my daycare kids and our world bumps along nicely.
  So somewhere in the middle of this crazy town madhouse I hope to recapture a bit of my old creativity, recreate some of my favourite stories and reignite the fire that is this (neglected) passion of mine.
     Wish me luck!!