Sunday, June 26, 2011

My Young Man.

There is no doubt about it, I'm a very lucky lady. Exceptionally lucky. Extremely lucky.
I have four children. Three of which I carried, gave birth to and have loved and cared for since the day they were conceived. The fourth is a different story. He's not mine. I'm not his Mumma. Sometimes I question myself, what exactly am I trying to be?

Being a Step-Mother has had it's challenges. I'm not going to paint it a rosy-coloured hue because sometimes it has been difficult. Accepting someone else's child as your own has it's ups and downs......beautiful highs.....depressing lows.

Sometimes we fight. We get angry at each other. I sometimes have trouble understanding him and he sometimes has trouble understanding me. At times I sit and wonder, Am I doing this right? Am I completely stuffing this up? Do I actually have a clue?

Where is the guide for wicked Step-Mothers? Isn't there a step by step manual somewhere that God should have handed me when I met his Father?

This morning, I had a good look at this beautiful young man I have known and loved for over seven years. He is caring and well mannered. He looks out for his younger siblings. He is eager to please. He is a good boy....No, he is an exceptional boy. His intelligence radiates. His internal beauty shines.
      His Mother & Father have defied the odds to help shape his remarkable personality together. They have been apart and yet, they have achieved this by working alongside each other, putting him first, setting aside any differences. I would really like to think that I have played a part too. I'm not his Mum. I'm not trying to be.

And I know, I know that despite the fact that he isn't 'mine', despite the fact that at times we're not always going to see eye to eye, I like to think that I have a special place in his life. He certainly has a special place in mine.


  1. :'( beautifully written... made me cry...

    having the love of a child that isn't your "own" is a precious gift I think...

  2. Thank you Vicky. He is a very special gift. I feel exceptionally privileged to have this role in his life. Thanks for stopping by. xx

  3. That was a really beautiful post. Brought a tear to my eye as well. He has remarkable parents - and is very lucky to have all 3 of you! If only every child had this gift.
    p.s. thank you for your comments on the post I wrote about my friend having breast cancer.

  4. Well said. As someone who got a step parent who accepted me as theirs 'Thank you'.

  5. Oh Lene this is a beautiful post. This young man is very lucky to have all of you in his life and vice versa. Regardless of whether he's technically 'yours', he's still 'yours' anyway because you love and care for him like he's your own. I'm certain the fights, arguments and disagreements would happen regardless of whether he is your son or your step-son because that's just what kids do. Don't they? You're a great Mum and step-mum xx

  6. Thank you Cathy and E. You have all made me feel really positive about this.

    Once again, you've made my day Jacqui! I do have arguments with my other children. I guess it's just seems worse when I argue with Mr 10 as I don't feel like I'm doing the right thing. It's very hard to explain! But thank you, thank you for your lovely kind words. I do know I'm doing the best I can:-)


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